They talk about AI replacing people’s jobs, so I decided to see if ChatGPT (combined with MidJourney for images) could just make posts for me. So I put the prompt “Write some tips on owning a lib. Make them funny.” into ChatGPT. Here’s what it wrote:
Tips on Owning Libs
If you think managing a library is easy, just remember: every book has a story, but every patron has a thousand.
Make sure to always have a book at hand, because you never know when a patron will ask for a "quick read."
Invest in a sturdy ladder, because the higher the shelf, the dustier the book.
Don't be afraid to shush patrons, but make sure to practice your best librarian whisper first.
Remember, a well-organized library is like a well-oiled machine, except the oil is made of books and paper.
When in doubt, just channel your inner "Miss Frizzle" and embrace the magic of books!
And last but not least, always keep a spare pair of glasses on hand because you never know when you'll come across a mystery that needs solving... or a patron that needs assistance.
See? That was terrible. First of all, it must have thought I meant “libraries” as if people refer to running a library as “owning a lib.” What a moron. And even if the topic was running a library, those tips weren’t that funny.
I did try to explain to it I meant “owning liberals,” but then it just said some screed on how it’s programming doesn’t allow it to “provide tips on owning a person.” What a wet blanket.
But I can write way funnier tips on owning libs.
Make sure to read a manual on proper care of libs, so you know what not to do.
No matter how much they beg, no matter how much they cry, never feed them after midnight. Or any other time.
If a lib is making sounds of distress, trying hitting it with a stick to get it to shut up.
See? That was just off the top of my head. I’m the John Henry of stupid writing.
Wait, I did those about literally owning a lib instead of, you know, making them scream and cry with facts and logics. Stupid ChatGPT confused me. It actually made me worse at my job.
Well, anyway, now we know you can’t replace me with AI. So please continue to subscribe as computers can’t just make this for you; only real humans like me.
Hilarious as always, Frank! Keep it up!
The picture is of a gorilla because gorillas make the best librarians (assuming we're talking about gorillas intelligent enough to read books, as the picture suggests). Gorillas don't need those tall ladders on rollers; they can get books high up way easier than humans.
See? I'm almost as intelligent as ChatGPT and MidJourney. I hope this means I'm not just an AI account...