The Button

A day in the life of President Joe Biden

President Biden sat at his desk in the Oval Office. He was so tired. And he wanted ice cream. But all the people had told him it was quiet time, so he had to just sit there and stare at his desk. He wanted to watch a TV show, but he wasn’t getting TV as punishment for trying to answer a reporter’s question when he wasn’t supposed to. So just sat there and stared.

There was something interesting on the desk, though. Something red. A button. A bright red button. There was something to do. He could push that button. Maybe something fun would happen. Biden reached out to touch it...

“No, sir!” yelled an aide as he slapped away Biden’s hand. “As I’ve explained repeatedly, that’s the nuclear launch button. If you press that, you’ll start a nuclear war and basically end all human life. You can’t press that button. You need to just sit there quietly, or you’re going to get yelled at again.”

The people in the place were always angry and telling Biden what to do. He didn’t like it here. He was so tired. And there was nothing here to do. But then he saw something. Something red. A button. A bright red button. He wondered what would happen if he pushed it. He reached out for the button...

“No, sir!” yelled the aide, again slapping away Biden’s hand. “I just told you that’s going to end all human life. You can’t push that button. I want you to nod at me that you understand that you can’t push that button because it will kill us all.”