Two Spider-Mans

It's not confusing, is it?

The construction crane began to buckle and break. Soon, it began to tilt over, and the man controlling it was thrown from the cabin. Peter Parker Spider-Man dived after the man and snatched him midair, swinging just before they hit the ground while Miles webbed up the crane and kept it from hitting a nearby building.

Spider-Man swung over and placed the man on a nearby rooftop while Miles landed beside them.

“Wow! Thanks, Spider-Man!” the man said to Spider-Man. He turned to Miles in his black Spider-Man outfit and said, “And thanks... whoever you are.”

“He’s also Spider-Man,” said Spider-Man.

The rescued man furrowed his brow. “Isn’t it confusing for you both to be called Spider-Man?”

“A little,” Miles answered.

“I just don’t want you to think one Spider-Man is better than the other,” said Spider-Man pompously. “We’re both equal Spider-Men.”

The man still looked confused. “But it’s just like a practical thing. You’re two different people; you need two different names.”

“I’ve brought it up multiple times,” Miles groaned.

“Hey, you’ve just internalized society's prejudice against you,” Spider-Man said. “You deserve to be Spider-Man just as much as me.” Spider-Man turned to the man they rescued. “If he were called something other than Spider-Man, people would think he’s the lesser Spider-Man because of his race.”

“His race?” the man asked. “How am I supposed to know his race? He’s wearing a costume that completely conceals his skin color.”

“Well, yeah, but he sounds black,” Spider-Man said.

“I what?” Miles exclaimed.

“You know... you got the street vernacular,” Spider-Man said. “It’s not a bad thing... it’s just a different thing.” Spider-Man turned to the man they saved, who was also black. “You know what I mean, right?”

The man shook his head. “Not really, but you’re saying the second Spider-Man is black?”

“And Hispanic,” Spider-Man added. “But I guess you wouldn’t know that unless you knew what his last name is... which you can’t because of secret identities.” Spider-Man turned to Miles. “Oh! I have an idea: Maybe we should call you Spider-Hombre to make it clear you’re part Hispanic.”

“I don’t know if I’m comfortable with that,” Miles said.

“Anyway, it’s great to have this new Spider-Man,” said the man. “He’s sure given Harlem a lot more attention.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Spider-Man shot back.

“Just seems like he’s around Harlem saving people more than we’re used to.”

“I’m sure there are now twice as many rescues in Harlem as before because there are two Spider-Men now,” Spider-Man said. “It’s not like I was avoiding Harlem before... though it is out of my way on my commute.” He turned to Miles. “Can you back me up on this?”

“I don’t know your commute,” Miles said, “but back to the topic at hand, I really think we should have different superhero names. It’s like, if we were a special forces group, you wouldn’t have two people with the same codename. It’s just too confusing.”

“I don’t want you thinking you don’t deserve the title, Miles.”

“Spider-Man!” Miles shouted.

“Oh. Whoops.” He shook his head. “Yeah, I guess it is weird to call you Spider-Man when that’s my name.”

“I’ll leave you two to this,” said the man. “Thanks again for saving me.” He turned and walked toward the exit from the roof.

Spider-Man turned to Miles. “So, I just realized that guy now knows your first name is Miles and you’re black but have a Hispanic last name. That might be enough for him to figure out your secret identity.”

“What do we do?” Miles asked.

“We might have to off him.”

“What?! Spider-Man doesn’t kill people.”

Spider-Man shrugged. “Not usually... but sometimes to protect my secret identity. Plus, since we just saved that guy’s life, killing him is kind of a neutral act.”

“I don’t think that’s how that works.”

“Oh, but because he’s black,” Spider-Man whispered, “could you kill him? It would just be a bad look if I did it.”

Miles just stared at Spider-Man for a few seconds. “I think I need a new mentor.”

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